There will probably be more drunk, less crying. I hope.
For how many of us is this true? How many custodial parents are making sure everyone else gets “their” time with the kids during the holidays at the expense of our own?
I get time today, Sunday, with the children, from 1pm to 6am in the morning, Christmas Eve, when their dad comes. They come home around midnight and go to sleep. They leave again at 3pm, Christmas Day, for Mike’s and come home at bedtime. And I’m STILL pissing off family.
You want to put your foot down. You want to say: No, I hate spending holidays without them. I hate spending it alone.
But it’s not about you.
Posted by Melissa on December 23rd, 2007 under Spawn
December 23rd, 2007 at 10:23 pm
[insert supportive hugs here]
December 24th, 2007 at 2:07 am
They’ll always remember you as the one who taught them how to share.
December 24th, 2007 at 3:46 am
I say phuck it and keep em - (as I pack my kids up to do the same all day trecking across town all day Christmas and Christmas eve, that I swear we won’t do every year, on every holiday- then realize the hypocritical assed pot/ kettle of the moment looks for the tequila for a shot - I figure every one should do a shot when they are caught saying some stuff they would love to be able to say for real and can’t - apparently there WILL be more drunk this year!)
December 24th, 2007 at 3:46 am
I really do wish you could keep em…
your the best kinda mom cause you don’t.
December 24th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Come over to my house! You won’t even have to get dressed. Come over in your PJ’s and we will drink something hot and talk about our children. You are the best kind of Mom and they know it. We all know it. Don’t be alone, come hang out with me :)I love you!
December 24th, 2007 at 1:58 pm
Therein lies the rub: I can’t Lindy! Because I’m expecting the kids home tomorrow “Whenever they are done…” I have to be around for when whenever comes along so I can tuck them right into bed. 6 waking hours with the kids from Christmas day to the day after Christmas…oh boy.
Today is the day of the major suck.
December 24th, 2007 at 2:06 pm
I am really sorry about this.
If it makes you feel any better, I really liked getting two Christmas mornings when I was a kid. It was one of the few good things about having parents who were divorced.* And as I got older, I really appreciated the sacrifices my mother made to make sure I got to see both halves of my family over the holidays. I expect your sons will, too.
*Of course, I don’t even know what it would have been like to have Christmas with all my family in the same house– I was so young when my parents divorced that I can’t remember. That might be why I have been busting my butt this year trying to provide a Norman Rockwell Christmas Experience to my son. Complete with hand cut paper snowflakes and a gingerbread house. Yikes.
December 24th, 2007 at 5:01 pm
Well what we did was my x had them Christmas Eve all day all evening and then I had them Christmas day all day all evening. It helped that his family always did Xmas eve and mine the day. It worked real well. My grand children also split time. It is hard but I wouldn’t want the children to know.
December 24th, 2007 at 10:37 pm
AM so sorry lady. Sending hugs (and booze) your way. Your boys are wonderful young men. And that’s because of YOU. (I know that doesn’t make tomorrow any better tho.)
December 25th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
I’d echo jaelithe’s sentiments. The only good thing about divorced parents was that I had double the celebrations: Christmas, birthdays, etc. It only gets worse when they grow up and have to then spend time with the in-laws. Likely they want to spend the whole time with you because you are a great mom, but they’ve just learned the art of compromise earlier than they should have to.
December 25th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
that’s why i spent sooo many years voluntarily working xmas. so much better than crying myself to sleep and waking up with a snot covered pillow.
December 25th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Zoe, for years I worked on Christmas because I had to. This is the first year since I’ve quit that job in 2003 that I wished I had it back.
December 26th, 2007 at 10:28 am
Oh, hon, I’m reading this so late, but I hope your day went OK. This is the kind of scenario that makes my stomach knot up into a terrified ball of ache in sympathy.
And also, I feel like an ass right now:
For the record, I officially take back every single second of bitching about having to cart the munchkin all over to different houses and all the family drama and the grandies’ trying to hijack the Santa moment and my aunt bitching at me for STILL nursing right when the baby was almost fucking asleep on me and all of it.
I really hope you had some great moments with your guys:) {hugs}
December 26th, 2007 at 11:39 am
Oh no, I bitched about that stuff for years, too. Because that too is sucky when you are wringing a little one along a ride that lasts wayyyy to long that day.
And the bitching about nursing, YES, oh yes, did I get that. Daniel was maybe oh, three months old his first Christmas and I got blasted by the sister in law because he was “too old.” THREE MONTHS?
Do not feel like an ass, please!
December 29th, 2007 at 6:19 pm
Talk about selfless! Reminds me of the quote:
\”A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.\” You could add that they should take the pie to their dad\’s house to share with him.
Elizabeth at A Wild Ride
March 23rd, 2008 at 8:09 pm
[…] I’m alone today because of several factors. Some of these factors I didn’t really get until Saturday night when I was being a crybaby to my boyfriend. The gist of my huffiness being that I tend to feel rejected and unwanted at the holidays and he wasn’t helping for Easter. […]