Archive for August, 2007

In case you were wondering

My sister is amazing.
A-mazing.
Thank you, Lindy. I love you.

Posted by Melissa on August 30th, 2007 under Accomplices | 2 Comments »

On the Whole Living Alone Thing

It sucks.
I hate living without a partner.
I realize that so much of this is because I DID live with a partner for my entire adult life. Except that one time.
When the boys’ daddy and I divorced a thousand years ago, I was so happy to be free of him and his Nintendo […]

Posted by Melissa on August 27th, 2007 under Boyfriendlies, Married Once, Twice, Whatever | 8 Comments »

Spam never disappoints me

Spam (spelling is remarkably good): “Dear Melissa, do u want 2 ift into Xtra LARGE condoms?”

Posted by Melissa on August 26th, 2007 under Observations | 4 Comments »

Boys

Daniel keeps his Clearasil pads

in this:

Oh yes, that’s a dice cup from the Pirates of the Caribbean gambling game.
Don’t ask me why they make a gambling game…or why he has it.

Posted by Melissa on August 22nd, 2007 under Spawn | 5 Comments »

First Day of School

My first day back went just fine. Except for discovering that the students were issued (or paid out the ass for) a revised version of the textbook, whilst I was still harboring the old version, all went well.
The boys also had a good first day. They are both now in middle […]

Posted by Melissa on August 21st, 2007 under Histoire d'Art, Spawn | 3 Comments »

The super ridiculous way I shave my legs…and it’s working

I shave my legs.
It’s not even a matter of wanting to, although as a slave to the patriarchy I am used to smooth legs and will NOT grow it out anyway, it’s also that my skin and hair follicles are so sensitive that any leg hair that touches pants equals rash time and folliculitis. […]

Posted by Melissa on August 18th, 2007 under Observations | 6 Comments »

On renting and other things that make my son melt into jelly at the grocery store

A few months ago, I was seriously considering buying a house. After 8 years of owning a house, it felt really odd to rent one. I want nothing more than some damn stability, god knows nothing else is giving me any stability right now, and a rental house was making me a little […]

Posted by Melissa on August 13th, 2007 under Moving, Spawn | 5 Comments »

Holy Too Much TV Time

My children are in Brett’s room, quietly, slowly, earnestly, and soulfully singing the jingle for Ebay.
“I found itttt on Ebayyyyy…”

Posted by Melissa on August 10th, 2007 under Spawn | 1 Comment »

Woman!!!

I love the bumper sticker that reads, “Woman, behold your son,” with an ultrasound image of a fetus.
We all think abortions suck, mightily. But some of us, you know, the women with the uteri and the lifetime of parenting and financing ahead of us, also know that sometimes abortions are necessary. You don’t […]

Posted by Melissa on August 7th, 2007 under Flaming Ovaries | 9 Comments »

I’ll grab two girlies and a beer that’s cold

Watch out.
I’m going to Strassenfest tonight.

Posted by Melissa on August 3rd, 2007 under Accomplices | 6 Comments »


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