Shakespearean Insult*
Saturday, friends and I attended the Shakespeare Festival in Forest Park.
All last week and several times before the Festival, I was told of last year’s events and the tragedy suffered. You see, these friends had attended last year. Or so they tried. They came early, set up chairs and enjoyed a picnic before the play. They wined and dined and jovially chatted the hour or so away, eagerly anticipating a gorgeous evening and a lovely performance.
Five minutes before the show, all hells broke loose. The sky opened and rain poured down. The friends had to hurry to gather things and themselves, hightailing it to various cars. The play shut down.
OMG y’all, guess what happened this year?
We brought the picnic, we sat in the chairs, we enjoyed the summery weather. Five minutes before the show, all hells broke loose again. Torrential downpour. We were soaked. At least last year, I’m told the afflicted just went to the movies.
There was no doing that this year.
By the time we got to the truck, my hair and cotton dress was plastered to me (an appealing sight to be sure, lovely lady lumps my ass). I swear it took eighty kajillion minutes to walk to the goddamned thing. When we finally made it, I lamely thought I could wring myself out a bit before actually squishing into the front seat, but failed miserably with the sideways rain and all.
NB peeled off his shirt to avoid sticking to the seat while driving home.** A few chuckles were had about this shirtless truck driving and the sheer awesomeness of it. I anxiously waited for the fantastic sirens and lights of a cop pulling him over.
I was giddy with the thought.
Not that he needed a ticket or anything that drastic, but to watch him get pulled over shirtless driving a truck gave me quite the tingle. It would be like an episode of C.O.P.S., only in REAL LIFE.
I believe I maniacally rubbed my hands together and cackled. And maybe prayed for it a little.
~~~
*Thou spleeny crook-pated scullian!
**Why, the newish boyfriend, of course.
Posted by Melissa on May 29th, 2007 under Accomplices, Boyfriendlies
May 29th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Gotta love our ever changing weather.
May 29th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
Would it be okay if I SQUEEd?
Okay, well, I can’t hear whether you said yes or not, so I’ll do it anyway:
SQUEE!
We heart newish boyfriends!
(((Melissa)))
May 29th, 2007 at 9:30 pm
That is really funny.
May 30th, 2007 at 7:24 am
I was in the downpour last year! It was epic!
But you had nothing to worry about with the shirtless truck driving. He also must have a mullet to be pulled over. He doesn’t have a mullet, does he?
May 30th, 2007 at 8:01 am
It sounds like the Festival ought to just give it up and do The Tempest next year.
May 30th, 2007 at 1:06 pm
MMMM, Rain-soaked shirtless newish boyfriends are yummy, no???
June 1st, 2007 at 10:11 am
Figured NB was your new boy toy.
I see you on a beach someday having not one or two but THREE cabana boys lavishing you with flirtatious attention and drinks.
(You will tell me all about it when that happens so that I can live vicariously through you, right?)
February 11th, 2008 at 12:04 am
[…] A big part of my most recent crazy has been my change in how I feel toward certain things. For instance, I’ve been seeing this man for some time now. At that post, we had moved to the girlfriend/boyfriend point for about a month. Obviously, we had been seeing each other before we accepted that label. […]