Love Thursday
Karen at Chookooloonks is doing something fabulous, as usual. Today is her Love Thursday and I want to share this with you:
This is (yes) another picture from my sister’s wedding. Late in the reception, Brett’s patience and stamina blow out and he retreats. Because he MUST retreat now or break down. I’m similar in this way. When I’m overwhelmed, I just want a place of my own to get away.
We realized somewhere in the haze of rum that Brett wasn’t dancing. Mike saw his little head under one of the tables. Brett had found a place of his own. His under-table fort was his sanctuary, a place to calm down, get sleepy, and get fed a thousand secreted Hershey kisses from mama’s disembodied hand.
After a while, and after a crying bout when Daniel wouldn’t respect his created sanctuary, Brett crawled out and into Mike’s arms.
If you don’t know, Mike is not the boys’ biological father. They see their father, but for a thousand reasons, he’s a part-time slightly disinterested, self-involved parent at best. I married Mike when Daniel was 3 and Brett was only 27 months old. He has been their parent in all its glory, good and bad alike. He immediately changed diapers, held them, loved them, played with them, and told them no when needed. He has gone on school field trips, he’s picked up a sick kid from the school nurse, he’s taken a boy and his broken arm to the emergency room. Mike is their dad, hands down. On school forms, when the boys have to list their parents, they list Mike and me. When it specifically calls for “Father’s Name,” they list Mike.
This picture is of a very tired Brett, surrounded by Mike’s arm. Once again.
To my children, Mike has been there for them. He is their dad. To them, he is love.
Posted by Melissa on August 31st, 2006 under Married Once, Twice, Whatever, Spawn
August 31st, 2006 at 11:43 am
That’s so nice. How lucky you all are to have found each other. :)
August 31st, 2006 at 1:10 pm
I am continually amazed that some men don’t show much interest in their children. And that saddens me. But it makes me so happy to see that your darling boys have a great dad. A dad they deserve to have.
August 31st, 2006 at 2:37 pm
That was the sweetest thing I’ve read in a long time. They are lucky… and so are you.
August 31st, 2006 at 4:30 pm
I see how you are. First, you reel me in by the shocking! coincidence of our husbands’ names and alma maters. Then, you make me laugh with your wit and sass. Now you make me cry with the awesomeness that is your husband. AND I’VE ONLY BEEN READING FOR A FEW DAYS! That’ll mess up a girl’s makeup. AT WORK, no less.
I’m very happy for you. Having found another wonderful Mike, I can relate to such powerful love. And I’m glad your boys get to see that from such an early age. Your Mike could teach a lesson or two to your ex.
August 31st, 2006 at 4:51 pm
What a sweet picture - a handsome boy with a strong protective arm around him. There’s just so much more to being a dad than the beginning! Glad you have your Mike and your guys have a daddy’s love!
Thanks for sharing.
August 31st, 2006 at 7:57 pm
What a great idea!!! Love Thursdays!!
Great post - Mike is the man!
August 31st, 2006 at 8:50 pm
So glad that your kids have a wonderful daddy!
August 31st, 2006 at 9:13 pm
Everyone should have a wonderful daddy - even if he’s not biological. Hurray for you and your Mike… you sound like terrific parents.
September 1st, 2006 at 7:57 am
I love it when you’re snarky but girl, can you ever pull on those heartstrings. I love this post, and this picture.
September 1st, 2006 at 8:36 am
Awww, thank you guys! Mike really enjoyed reading all of your comments. As usual, you are the best.
September 1st, 2006 at 9:00 am
mamatulip pretty much nailed what I wanted to say.
This was so sweet, Melissa.
September 1st, 2006 at 2:32 pm
Mike.
Mike ROCKS.
September 5th, 2006 at 7:43 pm
I don’t understand any parent who is not a “hands on” parent. You would have to kill me and hide the body to keep me away from my child.
You are all very lucky to have such a loving family.
A dad is not simply a sperm donor. Why don’t these men understand that??? Who wouldn’t want to be a part of their child’s life?
Obviously Mike is the true meaning of what a dad should be. There is so much love in your family and that is as it should be!